Lets All Raise a Doughnut to Celebrity Engagements

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^^ At least I’m not the only person wondering this question. ^^

Throughout the day, my brain generates around 111 random, life-changing (that’s probably not the right word, but it’s my blog so I’m going to run with it) revelations a minute.

Are whales the only animal that can help us comprehend the size of dinosaurs? What happens to all the unsold muffins after Bergen Bagel’s closes? Does anyone really like reading Shakespeare or do they just like the idea of telling people they read Shakespeare? Will Hem ever grow out of the terrible twos she’s currently going through? When will spring arrive and why is it snowing again? Do women really wear heels to impress men or impress other women? Are the stereotypes about people who do crossfit true? How many more or less people refer to themselves as feminists this year compared to last? When do raisins gets such a bad rap but everyone loves chocolate chip cookies?

They’re always the most profound thoughts. But recently, during a delayed  train ride home, with an extra 40 minutes at my disposal and my book tucked too deep into my backpack to retrieve, I began to wonder about celebrity engagements, or rather, my personal reaction to celebrity engagements.

***

ustv-steven-yeun

When it comes to hearing the news that a celebrity I’ve been crushing on for years is now engaged, I involuntarily relinquish a sigh of sadness and raise my donut to what could have been. Another good one off the market. Then quickly reality sets in, What the WHAT! All you know about this person is his face is sheer perfection! Get out of here Eddie Redmanye fangirl! You’re embarrassing yourself!

Because even though there is a better chance of me getting to play skeeball with a unicorn than there is of me meeting Steven Yeun, there is always the flickering possibility in my over active imagination that a Hollywood heart throb could end up with an everyday lady who buys Toy Story tshirts from the boys section.

I personally blame Matt Damon for instilling this illusion in the hearts of hopeless romantics everywhere. His wife was a bartender he feel in love with when shooting a movie in Florida and years later, they’re happily married parents of four! I mean come on Damon, you’ve incepted our minds with your love story! Now we can never go back.

So what did I learn on that unnecessarily long train trip through New York City’s underground? One, celebrity engagements have absolutely nothing to do with me. And two, even though I know I’m being absolutely ridiculous, sometimes I can’t help but be the 24-year-old tax paying, independent feminist who still daydreams about going on a date with Steven Yeun. What can you do.

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