Lets be real, aren’t we all a little bit of a hot mess?

^^ My interview with Lyle and Ashley of “Hot Mess Movs” web series. They remind me that often the messiest moments are the ones that open up doors we never knew existed. ^^

It’s official, this week I am just a hot mess.

I currently work at a start up magazine that is less than two years old. Working in a small company there are many perks for a beginning staff writer: unlimited creative freedom, never ending list of stories to write, conducting your own interviews, knowing and working with everyone in the company. It becomes less about the title you hold and more about the ideas that you bring to the table. But on the other hand, working for a start up can also be the worst. You’re often underpaid and overworked (this girl right here), there are no resources available for you, you pay for all your own gas going to all these interviews. And in the year I’ve worked with my magazine, I could not be more grateful for the opportunities they’ve provided me. I’ve seen my writing go from that of an inexperienced college student to a polished staff writer under the guidance of my editors and fellow writers. But as news of plans we had so counted on falling through, I couldn’t help but ask myself, have the cons started to outweigh the pros?

So here I am again, the same place I was nearly a year ago, scouring online job sites hoping to find the perfect fit. And with each application that gets returned, I can’t help but let the little doubtful voices in my head get louder asking: Will I ever find the right job? Am I good enough for these? What if I never find a job and become one of those homeless ladies on Newport Beach talking to her pet rock?

I have to be honest, it sucks and I hate it, but I hear these detours in life can often lead to the best things. On the upside, I have another interview for Voices lined up and am working on writing up the survivor’s stories. Fingers crossed come Monday I still have a job because job hunting with a paycheck coming in is much better than job hunting without.

So this entire post is not entirely a downer, I included a GIF of screaming minions dancing to make us all smile.

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